WHAT do Margaret Thatcher, John Major, Tony Blair and Gordon Brown have in common?
No, it's not the start of a Christmas cracker joke but a collection of prime ministers all cooked for by Alan Lavender.
The former head chef at the Prime Minister's official country residence, Chequers, catered to their every culinary need at the retreat in Buckinghamshire, including festive feasts.
Now retired to Holderness to be near family, he has lifted the (pan) lid on the seasonal traditions at the top table.
"Chequers was always traditional, you just couldn't do anything else," he says, chatting in the kitchen of the Roos home he shares with wife Diane, a retired midwife.
"It would always be the traditional Christmas lunch and it always had to be finished before the Queen's speech."
And traditional means turkey – not goose, duck or anything else.
"There's not that much you can do with it, but the Prime Minister is always given a turkey by the Turkey Federation," says Alan.
"I did have occasions where they wanted to send it quite a way before Christmas for the publicity, but I said, 'do you really want us to serve a turkey to the Prime Minister that has been hanging around a few weeks?'"
Once cooked, carving the huge bird was always something of a spectacle in the sumptuous dining room at Chequers, with its huge Christmas tree and sparkling silver cutlery and trays.
"We always used to carry the turkey through into the dining room," says Alan
"It was always big, about 40lbs.
"One person had to get up at about 4am to get the turkey in."
Alan had a particular method of adding flavour to the meat.
"I would put some stuffing in the neck, but not in the cavity," he says.
"I would put onions, carrots and leeks in there and whatever herbs complemented the stuffing, such as sage, as it would cook through into the meat."
A meat thermometer given to him by the Turkey Federation helped ensure everything was properly cooked.
"It's a real basic one and every cook should have one," he says.
"I use it for cakes as well."
Alan said the legs would sometimes be removed before carving and he has a top tip for making slicing the meat easier.
"Always take the wishbone out when it is raw, then it is easier to carve," he says.
"At Chequers, we would then wash the wishbone and give it to the Prime Minister at the table for breaking in two."
In another nod to tradition, Alan served chestnut stuffing with his turkey.
"I did two types of stuffing, I made a chestnut stuffing, of course, because everything was traditional and something else such as apricot because nobody really likes chestnut," he says.
"It was always a meat-based stuffing because that has more flavour.
"We never had pigs in blankets. We did have sausages, which were the fat ones cut up rather than chipolatas, because there were obviously a lot of children and they tended to like them."
It would not be Christmas dinner without sprouts.
"All the veg came from the kitchen gardens at Chequers," Alan says.
"With the spouts, I tended to blanche them then stir-fry with bacon, which is better than boiling them. And we used duck or goose fat for the roast potatoes."
Having served countless grand banquets to the rich and powerful at Chequers over the years, Christmas was actually relatively straightforward, albeit hard work, for Alan.
"There would always be about 22 or 24 guests and that's really comfortable for the dining room at Chequers," he says.
"Normally, it would just be a first course, a main course and a pudding and sometimes they would have cheese, otherwise it is too much.
"The first course was sometimes a soup, but a lot of the time it was some sort of fish."
A plentiful supply of food gifts given to the Prime Minister for Christmas, such as the finest caviar, was often used up over Christmas, too.
"The Christmas puddings were made in October and the children of the various prime ministers would help," says Alan.
"We used to make lots as Cherie Blair in particular would give a lot of them away as gifts.
"We also did chocolate logs and made our own Christmas cake as well as cranberry and bread sauce."
Christmas changed little over Alan's time at Chequers, but he and his team did have to accommodate the different wishes of the PMs.
"The Prime Minister changed but the menu stayed the same," he says. "Maggie always used to go to church and the Blairs, who were Catholic, of course, used to have a priest stay over for Christmas.
"The Majors didn't use Chequers at Christmas very often, they used it at New Year. In fact, when John Major was Prime Minister, I was working more at Number Ten than at Chequers.
"The staff used to have a Christmas drink with the Prime Minister, but, of course, you have a drink and you are trying to cook lunch at the same time and depending who is was, they would be encouraging you to stay for another while everything was going on in the kitchen.
"There would always be a cold buffet Christmas Day evening, so most of the staff could go home.
"Maggie used to insist on sending everyone home after it was served as she would clear the plates away herself.
"But we usually waited until she brought everything into the kitchen and then sort it all out anyway."
With more food to be served on Boxing Day, there was usually no time to waste.
"It would always be something without turkey on Boxing Day," says Alan.
"We would often do game pie as the Prime Minister would traditionally receive a 12 brace of pheasant and a whole venison from the Royal Parks."
Pleasingly, a little bit of God's own county is also always served at Chequers at Christmas, he reveals.
"We always served Yorkshire Puddings," says Alan.
"Why? Because everyone likes them."
